As a part of my Build Corps requirements, I have to do a quarterly reflection.
One of the questions is: Please describe
a situation in which you had a direct impact on a client, a volunteer, your
Service Site, or your community. Your description should clearly show how
something you did changed something about the situation, family, or individual
involved.
This is my answer.
I am a really intense person when I am in
my element. I talk a lot, I ask lots of
questions, I get excited, I am overly positive, and I love whatever I am
doing. I like to think that most of the
time it’s a good thing. But, I am aware
that sometimes it can be too much and I can exhaust a person just as easily as
I can energize them. This is blaring
true the week that I move a new resident into Elizabeth Place. I get so excited about all the resources we
have, the volunteers who can help, and the progress that is waiting to be
made. I love to help people! During this time, daily I have to remind
myself to chill out and take it down a notch.
The person that I am currently drowning with all my energy does not
share the same feelings; not even close.
The person that I am sitting across from practically screaming at in
excitement is scared, nervous, worried, confused, and unsure of the decision
they just made. The person I am sitting
across from is in a state of survival mode and this is all new and they aren’t
sure if it is good or bad yet. I
struggle with this every time. I try to
explain to them how wonderful Elizabeth Place is, how much love is here, how
many resources we have, how many friends they will meet, how much fun they will
have but they just stare at me in disbelief.
It has always been like this.
Recently, I admitted a resident who was like this, but to the extreme. Despite my efforts, she continued to function
as if she didn’t have access to any resources.
I tried to give her options of ways we could help and she turned them
down. I told myself to give her
time. The other residents in the house worried
about her. They came to me saying that
she was quiet, she kept to herself, and she spent a lot of time in her
room. I told them the same thing I told
myself, give her time. It wasn’t until
one day I overheard a conversation in the other room that I fully understood. One of our volunteers was offering to give her
a ride and my resident accepted. She
then told the volunteer, “This has been really hard for me. I have never had people in my life who have been
nice to me. I have never had people in
my life who truly want to help me. I
know everyone is excited to help but I have to get used to allowing people to. I have never had this before.” With tears rolling down my cheeks, I walked
away with a new understanding. It is in
these moments that I am not sure if I am making more of an impact on my
residents, or if they are the ones making the most impact on me.
One month later, she is happy and the light in her eyes is bright. She tells me she is happy and that she is
proud of herself for getting here. Her
laugh is contagious and she is a loving soul.
It is amazing what love can reveal.
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